Afraid to Touch?πŸ€šπŸΌπŸ’‹πŸ€

Are you a touchy feely person or do you squirm away when somebody reaches out for that embrace, that hug, to hold your hand? 

I love hugs and showing affection physically to people but it is so interesting to see how certain people just cannot take a close embrace. Some people cannot deal with touch, somebody showing affection and cannot give this affection in return easily either. In my opinion Touch is an essential facet of life, from the beginning as tiny babies we need that loving touch, those warm cuddles, that tender closeness with adults to keep us alive, to fulfill our needs. Babies are so dependent on others. Why does that touch and tenderness have to stop? Do we reach a particular age where we just have to toughen up, close up and not receive or show this love, tenderness and closeness with another? 

A simple handshake to introduce yourself, a hand on somebody’s arm/shoulder to show support, a warm hug to express love and care, holding hands with that special someone as a symbol of two souls conjoined. Surely these are all normal and natural expressions? 

“Don’t Allow Life to Harden You

Don’t Allow Life to Push others Away 

Begin Today 

That Hand 

That Touch 

That Expression of Love! 

See your Heart Open 

You’ll Fill with Emotion”

(Deirdre Ward) 


Are You a Good Dancer?! πŸ’ƒπŸ»

We are ALL part of the ‘Dance’ of Life. I personally feel I am not a very good dancer but would love to be! Music awakens my soul, it has such healing qualities and can really uplift me at times or help me to feel those sad emotions of loss, disappointment etc We choose songs depending on our mood and the particular feelings we want to feel. For me I play various songs because at times to only sit with my thoughts/feelings can be too much/overwhelming. The musical notes and lyrics help me to ‘feel’. I couldn’t imagine not having the ability to hear. 

I read a lovely passage last night about the body being our ‘Home’. Our bodies are amazing, we are such resilient creatures, we can be so vulnerable, we can exceed expectations, prove our abilities physically, fall apart from exhaustion, communicate anger, fear, love etc 

No words need be spoken in this ‘Dance’ with life and with others. Do any of us REALLY appreciate our body enough? We seem to constantly want to change it and shape/mould it into an image of ‘perfection’. Do we ever get there? Unless our mind/perspective can get to that ‘place’ there is NO hope of our body physically reaching that point! Simply put, we do need to LOVE our body in our mind, through our eyes before we reach that perfect point. It’s so difficult to do and I don’t believe that anyone doesn’t struggle with this. 

My favourite physical trait of the human body are the eyes. I love seeing the variations in eye colour and features! It fascinates me. If you find me staring into your eyes I apologise ha ha! Surely we all do this? Eye contact is such an important part of this ‘Dance’ together. 


The Eye is the window into the unseen inner world. I firmly believe so much can be seen through the eyes. The face is frequently the only part of our body that is naked. It can be extremely vulnerable, open to prejudices/opinions etc The face essentially reveals who you are and what life has done to you. Again no words are needed. A gaze can speak a thousand words. Words are overrated and can be too complicated! Through various aspects of our body this ‘unseen’ world can become visible. Our body never lies, afterall it is our ‘Home’! It’s important to talk to our body in a loving, gentle, forgiving and thankful voice. Gaze at it with love instead of hatred, disgust and contempt. Again a difficult task but every little effort is progress. 

I have been trying to use my eyes in this way and to the best of my ability in a loving and gentle way. It’s extremely easy for me to do this when I’m looking and gazing at others but it is MOST difficult when staring at myself in the mirror. It’s very difficult to see and confront your own life. My eyes can bring my life into view too closely, it can be too near! We all do need to go there, go back ‘home’ and face what your eyes are presenting to you. Our eyes can become so conditioned to only see what we want to see. This can be quite a negative aspect when all we see is the negative side to the ‘dance’ performed in life. Try your best to ‘see’ the beauty within you and everyone you meet. 

Focus on HOW you see instead of WHAT you see. 

“Dance Daringly in Life

Awaken to the Music of Your Soul”

(Deirdre Ward) 


Should’ve Gone to Specsavers!

eyes quote

One of my favourite things about people are their eyes. I am always fascinated to see the huge spectrum of colours and unique differences everybody has in their eyes. As mentioned before I believe that somebody’s eyes can tell their whole story and how that particular person is feeling inside.

“One’s eyes reveal how one’s soul is feeling” (Deirdre Ward)

I also never thought about the quote above i.e. that when we do these various actions, a lot of the time it is with our eyes closed! However my question is what happens if our eyes are constantly ‘closed’ even when we are trying our best to keep them ‘open’ and SEE our lives with more clarity? At times we can be blinded and physically ‘UNABLE’ to see, even if we go to Specsavers and pass the eyesight test with flying colours!

This happened to me last night! I would have thought I was very aware of how I feel, what areas of my life I need to improve on, who I need to look after and help out etc I do still believe I have a lot of clarity about these things however I identified last night, along with the help of someone else’s vision that I was totally blinded by my own eyes.

Since loosing my Mam two years ago I feel I have been quite strong, coped with her loss well and that I am healing my life on a daily basis. I am very grateful for having had her in my life and for all the special moments I had with her. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be for a partner to loose their ‘other half’. Yes I lost a part of me that was massive but my Dad had many more years with this exceptional lady. I have always tried to help him grieve, help him to express his emotions about loosing her and essentially help him to heal. For anyone that knows my Dad knows that he is such a quiet, private, strong, caring and honest man. He does not find it easy to express or open up about his emotions. I believe a lot of men feel this way and in my opinion it is quite sad and somewhat ‘unhealthy’. For one’s mental mind it is much more beneficial to try your hardest to open up to others and more importantly yourself about how you are feeling. Some say it is all to do with EVOLUTION but I believe it is all INDIVIDUAL.

To make a long story short, I was trying my hardest to help my Dad to heal with this loss in his life. So much so that it was causing a lot of frustration and even anger inside of me! I felt I didn’t know what else I could possibly do to ‘fix’ him. I do realise you cannot fix anyone else, that the only person who can fix themselves is that person. It didn’t stop me trying to help with his healing. Since moving home again, I have re-established my sessions with my councellor. I don’t like referring to her as that as in my eyes she is more like a really good friend that I can open up to and she in return helps to advise me and see with what areas of my life I need to work on! Last night as we were talking things through about my relationship with my Dad and how I am trying so hard to help him but that I feel he’s not taking my help a really hard hitting but also magical moment happened. The revelation came as a complete SHOCK to me and it felt so extremely scary and uncomfortable but at the same time so elevating and positive.

As I was explaining some things to her about our relationship and she was asking me some questions to ‘press’ certain buttons, I started to think and see the situation in a very different light. She told me that at the moment this ‘PROFOUND’ message was revealed to me, that my face looked like a frying pan had hit it!! The lesson I learned was that instead of trying to help my Dad heal and ‘fix’ his heart, I was blinded by the fact that what I really need to do is help myself to heal and ‘fix’ MY OWN heart. This might sound so simple to you reading my piece but I genuinely thought that I was coping ‘just fine’ and that it was the others in my life that needed help!

I totally view the situation now in a different perspective/light. It took the vision and perspective of another to help me ‘SEE’ more clearly. I know too that at times other people’s judgments, viewpoint or opinions might not be wanted and at times we have to be very careful about expressing what we feel another ‘SHOULD’ do or what is positive/negative in another’s life, however sometimes it is exactly what we need to see more clearly. I needed someone on the outside looking in to notice what I could not see. Be gentle giving your opinion and approach matters with caution and care but if you feel another person really needs to hear something to be able to ‘see’ something in their life don’t be afraid to express it in a loving nature. I also think a good foundation in a relationship needs to be established first before we have the ‘right’ to do this for one another.

“Sometimes we all need a helping hand and a new set of ‘lenses’ to see through (Deirdre Ward)

  

Power of Music

music-head-converted

I have always had a LOVE of music. One song can totally change ones emotions and either lift or lower one’s mood.

I remember my mam saying she knew I had a good ear because when I was quite young I told her to stop singing along to a song!! πŸ˜‚ God Love her she didn’t have a great voice and children are brutally honest! A great trait to keep if we can!!

I heard this song yesterday and it really struck a chord with me and what I’ve been speaking about the last few days.

Feeling isolated and far from peace, love, heaven, friendships, happiness and a lot more can happen so easily to far too many of us. What’s really important is how you deal with it – do you choose to:

‘Chase hearts’   ‘fix the parts’   ‘give in to pressure’   ‘lock down my door’

  ‘drink some more’   ‘stop thinking’   ‘rise or fall’ 

I believe everyone is fighting a ‘battle’ of some sort at all times in their lives because like I said before each day we can ‘improve’ on ourselves.

The important part of each day is whether we are fighting the battle to rise or  allowing and succumbing to the fall’  (Deirdre Ward)

‘Don’t be a shadow of yourself be your authentic self’  (Deirdre Ward)

 

Sam Smith ‘Drowning Shadows’ 

https://itunes.apple.com/us/post/idsa.58f9a801-8188-11e5-98e0-ae7090602894